Today we have a blog post from one of our Master’s level interns, Devin Kappie, about exploring and coping with trauma. Devin has a passion for helping others and considers it an honor to walk alongside her clients’ journey in living lives authentic to them.
Her counseling approach relies on the practice of and use of compassion, vulnerability, courage, and patience with oneself and one’s relationships. Holding a strong belief that everyone is capable of living a life that is true to themselves, Devin values therapeutic relationships as it is a space that prioritizes safety and authenticity without the fear of judgment.
She believes all people and bodies are worthy and valuable. Through the unique and innate strengths of clients, Devin hopes to reconnect those she works with to a life and sense of self that is embodied by peace, empowerment, and belonging.
An Exploration of Trauma Responses
Trauma is anything that places us outside of our ability to cope. There are all sorts of traumas that individuals and systems may experience. Trauma responses are unique to the individual, meaning they do not look the same for everyone. Sometimes, this may look like a quiet panic before a presentation, the sudden urge to withdraw from friends, or an emotional flooding triggered by a seemingly small event. As young adults navigating the turbulence of identity, relationships, and independence, it is common to carry unresolved trauma—often from childhood, adolescence, or even recent events. The good news? Healing is possible, and it starts with awareness, intention, and compassion.
Understanding Trauma Responses
Polyvagal Theory, developed by Stephen Porges, helps us understand how our bodies (and our brains) work together to respond to stressors that may oftentimes be a part of daily life, as well as how we may respond to traumatic event(s). Polyvagal theory says that our nervous systems are always trying to protect us and is assessing for threat, whether this be internal, external, or relational. When we experience a threat, our bodies may respond with trauma responses. These responses may show up as:
Fight: anger, irritability, overcontrol
Flight: anxiety, perfectionism, overworking
Freeze: disconnection, numbness, procrastination
Fawn: people-pleasing, ignoring personal needs
Though this is a brief overview of one theory to help understand trauma responses, working with a mental health therapist can help you further develop your own unique experiences with trauma and your responses. If you have been through a historical or recent trauma, we see you and we believe in your resiliency and ability to heal.
Trauma Response Tips:
Name What Is Happening
I invite you to practice having awareness around your possible trauma responses. Begin noticing patterns of how you respond during trauma or stress—do you shut down during conflict? Do you overextend yourself to avoid rejection? When you identify these moments, I encourage you to gently name them: “This feels like a freeze response.”
Remember, I always encourage you to practice curiosity over shame. Then, I invite you to practice naming the emotion that shows up for you. Are you feeling angry? Sad? Anxious? What need of yours is this emotion trying to tell you are not currently being met?
When we can begin to identify our responses and emotions, we are better able to attend to our needs and this is a path forward to beginning to create safety in your body.
Create a Safe Routine
Trauma makes the world feel unpredictable, and it also may work to prioritize protection over connection. By rebuilding a sense of safety through routine you may be able to begin grounding your nervous system. Examples of this would be sleeping consistently, eating nourishing meals and snacks, or even building micro-habits like 5-minute morning stretches or evening journaling. By building a safe routine, you can start to come back to yourself.
Build Healthy Boundaries
If you are a trauma survivor, you may have difficulty naming your needs and others’ expectations may feel high. One way to honor yourself and your needs is by setting boundaries. Start small—say “no” when you mean it, or take a break when you need space. It may feel uncomfortable, but discomfort does not mean danger. Setting boundaries is a way you can continue to show up for yourself in your healing.
Seek Connection, Not Isolation
Trauma may convince you to heal on your own. However, healing happens in relationships—with friends, mentors, therapists, or support groups (and within your relationship to yourself). It may feel scary to reach out to a loved one and be vulnerable with what you are experiencing. Vulnerability takes courage, but connection rewires your brain toward trust and safety.
Being a young adult may feel like walking a tightrope—balancing ambition, relationships, and self-discovery. If trauma is part of your story, know that it does not define your future. You have the power to rewire old patterns, to create safety within, and to build a life that is shaped by healing.
Give yourself permission to grow slowly. Give yourself permission to reclaim your peace.
Resource: A great resource to use is the National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) organization, which has a mix of different forms of support with one of them being the NAMI blog! The blog shares about the many struggles that people may be facing, with one of them being trauma. By hearing others’ stories to receiving more information and support from mental health professionals, my hope is that you feel less isolated in your journey to healing from your trauma. NAMI Blog.
Affirmation: “You are allowed to struggle. You are not alone. You deserve to take up space in this world.” – Unknown
You got this!
Devin
We hope you found Devin’s insights on exploring trauma responses helpful. If her message resonated with you, this could be the perfect time to take meaningful steps towards your healing and peace. To initiate your work with Devin, please feel free to call our office at 615.510.3797 or click here to learn more.
